Thought I’d do another logical progression of my thoughts and experiences, to try and make sense of things. I quite enjoyed the Gnosticism one I did and it helped me to understand more of my own assumptions and ideas of life.
1) God doesn’t exist. I think I’ve come to that conclusion by now, so I’m going to have that as my foundational assumption. To explain why briefly, it’s because I have met many deities, but never an Ultimate Being, and the idea of one seems too distant and far away, too much removed from reality to be, well, a reality.
2) Deities, angels, aliens, ghosts, and demons, however, do exist. I’ve experienced enough of them to know. There are probably other types of beings like fairies and such.
3) There are different realities which host these different beings and we can interact with them spiritually. I wouldn’t class these realities in terms of a hierarchy, but rather just different universes that we can choose to interact with. For example, Jesus’ Heaven is different to the Muslims’ heaven.
4) So, obviously our beliefs do have some effect on where we end up, meaning our thoughts have some power over our reality. Which makes Thought or Mind a backdrop of reality. Whilst there may be no Ultimate Being, there has to be some interconnectedness. How else would a thought influence our reality? Obviously a thought goes out and creates a change in our environment.
5) Therefore, some situations in our lives are a result of our own minds dreaming up their own reality. Other situations could be a collective effort. If there is one big ‘Divine Mind’, then it could be either/or. Perhaps our own thoughts have some sway over our reality, and other thoughts have a larger sway.
6) For example, my entire family and extended family and their friends were praying for my Christian conversion. This could’ve influenced the (impersonal) Divine Mind so much to make it an actual reality.
7) This means in effect, reality is completely Mental, giving an idealistic monistic flavour to my musings.
8) This must mean, that part of what I’ve experienced in my life is part of my own making, and the other part is part of the collective’s making. My identity is a mix of my own ego and the collective ego’s (or perhaps ‘group identity’s’ might be a better way to phrase it) thoughts.
9) Therefore, demons thoughts must have some sway over my manifested reality, as well as Jesus’ thoughts. So we’re constantly being impacted by the wave of thoughts from the ‘Divine Grid’ around us.
10) I can’t get over the idea that we’re all like an interdependent entity influencing and affecting each other all at once. Perhaps the stronger you get spiritually, the more sway and influence you have over the Divine Mind.
11) However, I’d say that the Divine Mind itself is impartial, not a living entity.
12) Now the question is, did the Divine Mind exist first, or did the Material World exist first, and we via a collective thought created the Divine Mind? However, just the idea of suggesting that the collective mind created the divine mind is a bit absurd, suggesting there must have been a Divine Mind is the first place to be influenced by the collective mind.
13) So mind is everything. It is neutral, neither positive nor negative. In that sense, the Mind can’t be the Creator, as it has no manifestive equilibrium of its own. But rather the Creator(or Creators/Created) appeared as a result of the Divine Mind not knowing itself (this is explained in more detail in chapter one of the Corpus Hermeticum)… it is sort of like the mix of primordial chaos and the Divine Mind (the primordial chaos from which the Divine Mind emanated from) creates a state of ignorance, which is the created/creative reality. And so the Demiurge was born.
14) The Demiurge then has creative power, whilst being a creation itself. So it is not omniscient, but a living, finite being. And then out of the creative elements it’s been given from the Divine Mind, it starts creating other ‘creators’, or the archons. And these create their own universes. Some create ours, others create others.
15) The Demiurge itself is neither good nor evil, but with self-awareness comes the choice of polarity, which it explores in order to know itself more.
16) Therefore what happens to us in our lives is a result of the Demiurge’s greater goal of knowing itself in relation to the Divine Mind and Ultimate Reality (which is ultimately Nothing).
17) I guess here as humans and created beings we would have the choice of getting on the Demiurge’s good side, or the archon’s good side, so that we can choose our own polarity. I suspect that we connect to the Divine Mind through the Demiurge. So perhaps duality/polarity has to be totally transcended before we can becomes Created Creators ourselves.
18) Ultimately everything in life is subjective, and subject to the Demiurge’s Will.
19) Which means, everything that’s happened to me was a result of the Demiurge exploring polarity through me. It ‘fragments’ itself in a similar way that the Divine Mind did in order to create a sense of separation from Divine Mind.
20) So, perhaps, I couldn’t understand the concept of being fragmented until it happened. Perhaps in a sense being fragmented is actually an illusion, and is only a reality at the time I experienced the separation. What I mean by that, is that fragmentation never happened in the past, nor is it ‘going to be’ healed in the future, but, rather, our sense of what is ‘real’ shifts in each moment, and therefore our reality shifts. (That’s probably still not very clear… what I mean really is that there is no true cause-effect process)
21) By being ‘present’ we transcend all illusions and sense of fragmentation. Which means the Demiurge is subject to time, as well. Whilst the Divine Mind is outside time.
22) And therefore, I have ended back up at a non-dualistic version of reality, albeit a complex one.
I think I’ll stop here now. I’m thinking though that if ‘fragmentation’ isn’t really true, and rather just an illusion, then neither is the Demiurge truly separate from the Divine Mind, making there absolutely no distinction between them. In the end it is just ‘Source’ exploring itself. Which means there’s nothing we can really do to be ‘closer’ or ‘further away from’ our true nature. We are just collectively exploring polarities. Polarity is part of life, just like the yin yang symbol.
And I guess that ultimately it means we have no true identity. I guess with this view I could either take or leave Jesus. I know now he’s not perfect, he’s as yang with a little bit of yin, whilst the demons are probably yin with a little bit of yang. Jesus isn’t perfect, but then no one is. Which gives me the choice on whether I really want to accept him as part of my reality.
I will have to muse on that some more.